What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

What is the reason that Worcester, Massachusetts is not as well-known as Boston and Springfield, even though it is a large city with many neighborhoods?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

TEXT:

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Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

How did my ex move on very fast?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

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Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Why cant I sleep? When I'm about to fall asleep, I get excited that im about to sleep, causing me to wake up again. It repeats till my sleepiness is gone. I tried taking melatonin and not using my phone, but I end upawake for hours.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

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Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

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And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Why has Biden pulled ahead in battleground states and is now projected to win the 2024 presidency?

Make Nazis afraid again!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Why do men first look at a woman's chest instead of their face?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

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Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

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I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.